Facts About Male Endurance In Bed
Let’s face facts, guys: the majority of men come within 2 minutes of penetration. And this simply isn’t long enough.
Some men even come within 30 seconds – but they’re the guys who really do have a serious case of premature orgasm. (If you’re one of these men, we’ll see what you can do about this in a moment. More power to your elbow for wanting to know how to increase stamina in bed.)
But whether you last 30 seconds or 2 minutes, you certainly need to be looking to improve your stamina in bed.
That’s because as far as women are concerned, the ideal length of intercourse is between 7 and 10 minutes. But sadly for them, sex only lasts 5.4 minutes on average.
There are two conclusions you could draw from this: women have greater stamina in bed than men or women want more intimacy and longer lovemaking than men choose to provide.
Then again, it’s important not to get too hung up on statistics. Even if you’re a guy who can only last a couple of minutes, it’s easy to improve your stamina, and it’s very easy if you set a clear intention: you want to know how to increase stamina in bed and last longer, and you’re going to do that, come what may.
The Stamina Men Need To Satisfy A Woman
Interestingly enough, women say that sex which lasts for between 3 and 7 minutes from penetration to male ejaculation is merely “adequate”.
Ideally, women want us to make love for between 7 and 10 minutes before we come. So what we have to achieve in terms of improving our stamina as men is very clear.
But the question of female orgasm and satisfaction is tied up very closely with the question of male stamina and how to increase it.
A lot women say that sex without orgasm satisfies them because they feel a strong connection to their partner. But is it possible they simply say this because they know they can’t expect to get anything better from men? Or do women secretly desire a man who can thrust for long enough to bring them off during intercourse? And is that even possible?
So many questions, so few answers!
But we do know some things.
We know that the average duration of intercourse is 5.4 minutes. We know that women who do reach orgasm during lovemaking require 9 minutes of thrusting on average to get to climax.
We also know that at the moment, only 15% of women will reach orgasm during intercourse from thrusting alone. And another 10% of women receive enough clitoral stimulation from either their own hand or their partner’s hand, or even a vibrator, during intercourse to reach orgasm.
But what we don’t know is how many women would come during intercourse if men had enough stamina to last longer in bed before ejaculating.
In other words, how many women would come (i.e. climax or orgasm) if men had the stamina to last for what women regard as the ideal duration of intercourse – between 7 and 10 minutes?
We don’t rightly know, but judging by the reports that women constantly exchange in their forums on the Internet about how they’re left “hanging”, highly aroused but not orgasmic, when their man ejaculates, I’d say it’s a lot.
As you know, when a man ejaculates, it normally signifies the end of sex, because a man’s endurance fades fast after he has come.
Sadly there aren’t any data available on exactly how many women could achieve orgasm during longer lasting intercourse, but from the work I’ve done over the past 10 to 15 years on the Internet and in person with couples, as well as men and women, my guess is that it’s around half of all women, at a minimum – provided that foreplay is adequate.
You see, the other side of the equation about stamina is foreplay. Sex isn’t just about penetration and thrusting. For women in particular, it’s just as much, if not more, about connection, love and intimacy, and indeed enjoying the sensuality of kissing, cuddling and caressing.
How To Increase Stamina In Bed
The first thing a man can do if he doesn’t last long enough is to increase the length of foreplay so that his woman is can get the sensual pleasure in bed that she wants.
We have a page on foreplay because it’s so important for women. As a man you may find it hard to understand why it’s so important, but take it from me – your sex life will be transformed if you spend enough time on foreplay.
(By the way, “enough” means 20 to 30 minutes. That length of foreplay will give your partner lots of pleasure, turn her on, and make intercourse a lot more enjoyable…. for both of you.)
The real question, though, is what we men can do to extend the length of lovemaking, in other words to extend the time between penetration and male ejaculation.
In short, how do we discover how to increase stamina in bed? Do we use natural ways to increase stamina, or do we use medication, or do we use some other technique that will help men increase male stamina naturally?
This whole site is devoted to answering those questions.
We’ll start below with a brief overview of the options available to increase male endurance in bed.
Techniques to Improve Lovemaking and Increase Stamina
First of all, if we’re talking about just improving the quality of lovemaking with your partner, you need to be good at foreplay – which you can think of “sex play” if that sounds more appealing.
Truth is, many men find foreplay boring. Obviously men are designed to penetrate a woman and ejaculate as quickly as possible – that’s Mother Nature’s plan for producing babes. But we don’t have to follow it!
We can set our intentions to do things differently, to have a long period of foreplay, doing what will please a woman in bed – and that way you can get off to a flying start when it comes to intercourse itself.
Second, techniques recommended by many therapists and doctors over the years might not be the best approach nowadays.
For example, there’s the stop-start technique and the squeeze technique. But neither of these are easy or even enjoyable to use, and there’s not a great deal of evidence that the results are maintained over time.
One thing, however, that does seem to bear great promise for extending male endurance naturally is Kegel exercises. In one study, the duration of intercourse was extended by 5 times in a group of men who were trained in Kegel exercises.
So it seems that increasing the power and strength of the muscles in your pelvic area really can help you last longer in bed.
Admittedly this group of men were really quick ejaculators – on average coming within 33 seconds of penetration – but nonetheless this looks like it could be a good way of increasing longevity in bed naturally.
Third, you could use medication. Although Dapoxetine can delay ejaculation, it’s not licenced in the USA for premature ejaculation treatment.
In Europe it’s marketed under the name Priligy, but the sad fact is that it can cause some really quite unpleasant side effects (up to 20% of men taking it will feel nauseous), and the increase in the duration of intercourse which it produces isn’t that great. In fact Dapxoetine is not going to help you extend lovemaking to the 7 to 10 minutes of intercourse regarded by women as ideal.
Fourth, there are some interesting ways of dealing with the fundamental problem of men who ejaculate too quickly. You know what that is?
It’s being too aroused, too soon, and reaching the point of ejaculation almost before they’ve started making love.
One approach to overcoming this excitement is vaginal containment, which basically means getting used to the feeling of your penis inside your partner’s vagina. As we’ll see, you simply enter her and then lie still for a while until the sensations of excitement and arousal have died down.
Vaginal containment can be very effective in helping men get used to simply being inside a woman, so making the whole experience less “out-of-control”; it’s particularly useful for inexperienced men who want to increase their stamina in bed naturally.